However, this is a concept that isn't understood or modeled very much in our society. When couples come in to see me and they are having difficulties over issues , one or the other or BOTH parties will present that they are 'right' and the other person is 'wrong'. I will often take an object nearby and say "if this is the problem then you two are fighting for who gets to define it (placing it between them) vs. working together to solve this thing that is not either of you (positioning them together looking out towards the issue) Both people have to see every issue as something for them both to feel good about at the end of the discussion. If one or the other is trying to 'win', then the other party will harbour resentment and the anger will get stored and come out in another way or ......eventually.....that person will get so frustrated and angry that they leave.
This is both of your lives. If you want your partner to trust you then you need to show them that you care that they are happy and satisfied with the outcomes of your decisions together. It's teamwork. And teamwork is about solving problems about the external forces that are impacting upon your relationship together, not competing with each other. Negotiate your differences and figure out how you can create a life that will make both of you happy. Listen and make sure you are hearing and validating the other person's perspective more than you are trying to get your point across. People get into relationships to be connected to, loved, listened to and validated. Each discussion is an opportunity to do that or not.....and, ultimately, the choice you make will determine the outcome of your relationship. And if you win this thing then you'll walk together forever!