Good mental health is really no different than what lots of 12 Step programs recommend. 1) Focus on what you have control of... which is yourself and not other people's judgements or reactions. 2) If you get off track, be accountable to yourself. Own your mistake. If it happened within the context of a relationship then have the courage to own it with the other person/people and don't give shame the power to keep you in hiding. 3) Forgive yourself and calm yourself out of any shame that may have surfaced and then 4) show up with your intention and start at Day One again. The focus is on the learning and the process and not about the outcome or product. You are already ok. We are all learning and NO ONE is doing it perfectly. If someone eludes to you that they are doing it perfectly then .....RUN!!!! They will not be good for your mental health! You are creating new neural pathways and that is not an easy feat. You will have enough internal resistance from your own internalized perfectionism from society and whatever you got growing up. You do not need to add to it by surrounding yourself with people who are outcome or product oriented.
Here's a song by Submersed called "We all Make Mistakes" https://youtu.be/khTS_Q_qPqs
There you go. The person who was role modelling resilience by being mindful of my mistakes and learning from them happened to be me! I will resume my blogs on learning from other people's resilience in the fall.
In the meantime, since it is summertime, I am going to focus my blog posts on 'mindful moments' over the summer.
Have a good summer everyone!